Dr. Orlean Brown-Earle, child psychologist and family therapist answers this question and more at:

 http://www.jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091228/news/news4.html

I remember when our son was in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) right after he was born, and I said to my husband, “If anything happens to him, you do realise that I will kill myself?” I know this sounds drastic, but I really meant it. I did not know how I would be able to go on without him, even though I’d only known the wee one for nine days!

If I’m being completely honest with myself, that neurosis started the day I found out I was pregnant. I used to say to my husband, “If you ever have to choose between the baby and me, save the baby.” He never understood me, but this all changed the moment he came into the world! When it comes to keeping the little chap out of danger, I trust my big chap implicitly. Realistically, both of us are completely responsible for keeping him safe. It’s easy to say that now, of course, while he is unable to walk (the baby that is), but how will we manage when he becomes more mobile? What about when he starts school, or when he goes partying as a teenager?

Feel free to comment as you read the rest of the article at: http://www.jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091228/news/news6.html

Information provided by The Office of the Children’s Registry indicated a steady rise in this criminal behaviour.

In 2007, 81 cases were reported to the office with a hike in 2008 to 1,607 and, 1,995 up to August this year.

Against the background of the spike in these reported incidents, the registry is urging parents not to leave their children at home unsupervised.

Children’s registrar, Carla Edie, stated that parents should ensure they are carrying out their parental roles effectively, as they can be fined or imprisoned if they do not.

Read more at:

 http://www.jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091228/news/news7.html

Raymond Simmonds, a father of three preteens, knows that it is essential to keep the young ones active and out and about. “Sometimes we go to the country and go to the river in St Mary and they take fun in going to Trelawny where my wife comes from,” he said. “They go crazy about getting the drive-out and going to the country.”

The proud father said that the children go wild with excitement when he and his wife, Gladys, take them out. This breaks the monotony of home in Angels, St Catherine.

He said most of the time, Andrew, 12, Ariel, 9, and Andre, who is five, are more creative than their parents in finding new games, and it’s added pleasure when he joins them in their card games. “It’s like fun to conquer Daddy in a game, so there are things that they might do over and over, but having Daddy come and sit with them while they are doing it is like an added incentive.”

Not every parent is as creative as this dad, in helping the children beat boredom. Kathleen O’Sullivan of Smart Kids’ Nursery and Pre-School in St Andrew has some ideas. She said children have a short attention span and this should be taken into consideration when the parents are playing with them.

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091221/news/news10.html Feel free to leave comments.

Countless studies prove that what goes into an infant’s mouth has direct effect on his or her growth and development. I’ve written about breast milk in the past, so I’m not going to harp on how perfect it is. What I am here to discuss is the relevance of a parent’s choices when it comes to giving your son or daughter solids.

Books suggest that in the first stage of weaning, you start your baby on infant rice cereal, and once you’ve established that he or she does not react adversely to it, you introduce vegetables and fruits. These are to be given one at a time, for three to five days, before moving on to the next item, so that allergies may be easily detected. Some urge you to try your baby on the sweeter foods, such as banana and pumpkin, while I decided to go for the blander vegetables like cho cho, callaloo and Irish potato. Fortunately, our son lapped and smacked up the whole lot!

For years I have been listening to parents comment on what their children like, or not, to eat. “My baby girl refuses to eat carrots”, or “Our child hates broccoli!” According to my paediatrician, it can take up to 20 times of tasting a food before a baby gladly accepts it.

Read the rest of the article at

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091221/news/news8.html Please feel free to leave a comment.

 Dr Melrose Rattray, director of Help for Parents Jamaica and Help for Parents and Families in New York, had a word of advice for them. “If we try to parent alone, we lose the support of those around us. We are not alone.”

At a recent seminar at the Knutsford Court Hotel, Rattray used interactive role playing to address the concerns of these parents. She said this method has worked in the other Caribbean islands, as well as in countries like England and America, regardless of background.

So, at the start of the workshop, she told the gathering of parents and guardians to stand beside some tags that were posted on the walls. There were more than 10 of the tags, but it was obvious that these strangers had a lot in common as three of them chose to stand by the tags which read: ‘Not enough time’ and ‘They don’t listen’. One parent chose ‘Tired’ and another ‘Don’t seem to be getting the results that I want’.

 A hearty discussion followed when the group was divided into two groups – ‘C’ and ‘D’ – and told to write a letter to an alien telling it about Earth. They were to use descriptions based on the letter of the group to tell about the problems with teenagers. Many concerns were brought to the fore, with Dr Rattray intervening at different stages to make recommendations. “What we put in them (children) determines the output so we, as parents, have power,” she declared.

 She suggested that in dealing with the issues, parents should separate the deed from the doer. Speaking about the bad habits rather than critising the child is more effective in dealing with teenagers, she said. Another point she stressed is that parents should supervise and not ‘snoopervise’. However, she said if parents have suspicions, they should make checks and do follow-ups to stay on top of each situation.

 Rattray said the parents need to know how to do their job and this can be done with a combination of methods. Modelling is important, and parents need to portray behaviours that they want to see the child reflecting. Additionally, teach the child how to behave appropriately and responsibly. She said coaching is also important and parents need to provide guidance. She noted that parents should encourage their children and give reminders to express confidence.

 Mould them

 The audience was asked to play with play doughs that she provided, while delivering the lesson. “We have been given the task while they are in our hands to mould them (children) and prepare them for life,” she said while explaining that parents have a job to ensure their children are brought up with responsibility and sensitivity towards others.

 It was at this point that Lloyd, a participant in the programme, blurted out: “Sometimes I have to take my teenager around the back of the house and say, ‘You see those trees? You see money growing on them?’ Everything they see on the TV they want.”

 There was much laughter, but the audience agreed that it was the reality as today’s teenagers generally ‘want everything and want it now’.

See more stories at: http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091221/

During grades one to three, he was above average in his schoolwork. However, since grade four and now grade five, I have noticed that his grades have been going down. He reads well, but is unable to spell as well as he reads. He will do math today and will get them all correct, but forgets how it is done the next day. I have been sending him to extra classes but I am still not seeing any improvement with his grades. This is really depressing me right now as at times I do get upset with him when I keep explaining and he doesn’t seem to be getting it. His sister, who is attending university, also gets upset at times when she is teaching him. I was surprised when she came home last week and told me that it is possible that the effects of our divorce is just now affecting him.

Can this be possible? Please note that he sees his father only when he happens to pass him on the road. His father has been out of his life since my separation. He is the third of three children.

See what Dr. Orlean Brown-Earle, child psychologist and family therapist tells this parent. Also check out the other queries and don’t forget to leave comments.

http://www.jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091214/news/news6.html

“I am very worried and nervous,” she said “… I felt so ashamed to know that a teacher could be cursing a four-year-old child like that. I realised he had a problem in writing letters like ‘s’ and the number ’2′ but based on what his teacher was saying – he was writing everything backwards.”
The mother said that her eight-year-old daughter does very well at school.
“I am desperately in need of your help as I really want him to do well so that teachers don’t have to cuss him at school, which I know for certain will damage his sense of esteem and he will hate school.”
Child psychologist Dr Orlean Brown Earle tells her how to handle this situation on Page D1 of today’s Gleaner.
What would you do if you were this parent? Should this teacher be fired? Is the mother too sensitive? Give us your views.

Yet, how many parents think consciously about their ability and responsibility to nurture a positive self-esteem in their child?

Join in and give your views. See full article at:

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091109/news/news6.html

“Some of the fun don’t look so fun anymore,” said Kenny Myers, the father of a three-year-old son, summing up his feelings about the experience. The responsibility that comes with parenting is often understated, he said, as there is a lot of work to be done. Nevertheless, he is honoured to be a parent.

Myers was one of several parents who attended a recent parenting seminar hosted by Dr Melrose Rattray at the Knutsford Court Hotel in St Andrew. They all seemed to share similar sentiments. Being a parent is hard work.

What are your views? Read the full article and let us hear from you.

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20091109/news/news7.html