Bad boys
Should mothers be held responsible for boys who become criminals?
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Tags: Add new tag, boys, children, crime, criminals, Jamaica, mothers, parenting, positive
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28 Responses to “Bad boys”
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While mothers are no doubt a responsible party in their children’s delinquencies, I am reluctant to say that they cannot be held totally responsible for this. There is no doubt that most mothers cover-up and harbour their criminal sons misdeeds (and some even benefit financially from them). But where would that leave the father who is either absent, refusing to support, or is a criminal example to his son?
Mothers are known for spoiling their sons (something to do with the Oedipus Complex), but there is a direct correlation between dad’s actions and what his sons grow up to become – even if dad doesn’t necessarily live in the same house.
Having said that though, there are way too many moms who are actually responsible for this. Mom who refuse to tell there sons when they are wrong. Moms who sit back and turn a blind eye at their sons criminal actions and criminal enterprizes simply because they are reaping the benefits of their son’s murders and robberies.
Yes, there are mothers without conscience, and principles, but I can’t imagine mommy being solely responsible for Little Johnny turning a Big Criminal, when Big Papa John wasn’t even around to see it happen. Maybe Big Papa John was even the “prison bird” example that Little Jonny aspired to become. But let us hear what others thinks.
How big is this problem? It’s a very big headache, the Boy’s home, or reformatory schools are now over crowded and these Jamaican mothers who are so careless and stupid, knew that opening their legs with these men have absolutely no financial future.
Firstly this man does not work, if he does so many other women are expecting their share of his stipend, He may have several other children, and he curses and beat the daylight out of you. To make matters worse, you as a woman knows little about growing, and raising a child with good parenting skills, and of course it takes a combined commitment of mother and father to make this child an asset to our declining society.
So yes, resoundingly all mothers ought to be held accountable for their bad head pickney. Lock them up, both of them together. lol.
If a woman does not want a child to be born then practice safe intercourse. No matter what the man may say to this woman, she’s the last person in-line to make that decision. These worthless Jamaican females who place their children on others to create a terrible burden for the police and the community. What an awful life, knowing you can get pregnant.
It’s sad, very sad and irresponsible Jamaican women, who then curse these men and tried to turn them into fathers when in fact the writing was on the wall. Then you hear these men in the mall, Yea mon, a mi breed that, fire one up inna de oven an mek it breed, yea mon!! lol. Lock them up. These ‘boys’ cannot be overnight fathers.
Mothers should not be held responsible for boys who become criminals.Most of the mothers brought up these boys the right way.
And what exactly does this question achieve?
What we should do is teach PARENTING SKILLS to students at the secondary school level, and let it be understood that FATHERS are needed in the homes. There should be an aggressive “social engineering programme” that promotes the NUCLEAR FAMILY as the family of choice in the Jamaican society, so that the social decay we are experiencing can be arrested and reversed. Simple as that.
Oh, I almost forgot. The feminist are not with that. They want the nuclear family to collapse so that the patriarchal figure is removed from the home and society at large. Boys should not be raised as responsible, ambitious intellectual men who aspire to leadership positions in society. They should be jobless dunces, lowly blue collar workers and lost souls, murdering each at a genocidal rate in the streets. The society can then be wholly owned, managed and ruled over by women, under the new feminist matriarachy.
So when you ask: “Should mothers be held responsible for boys who become criminal?” is that where we’re at already?
I think it would be correct to state that SOME mothers are responsible for boys who become criminals. First of all, where are the fathers? The male figure plays an important role in the upbringing of a child. Many fathers have either passed away or deserted their offspring, leaving the heavy task for the mothers alone to bear. The environment that we now live in makes it even harder, as some boys, even though raised in the right way by their mothers, are influenced by their peers and ,especially, the dancehall artistes to becomes “dons”, “gyalists” and “gangstas”. Because they lack a father figure, most boys turn to these artistes as their role models, and are therefore led astray, onto the path of evil.
Secondly, there are some mothers who do not care a bit about the rearing of their children. They do not assume authority in the home, and the children become their age mates, or even the “big man and woman” of the home. Some mothers, because of their lack of finaces,encourage their sons to rob, steal and “hustle” in order to have money to provide for their basic needs. The habit becomes a part of their character, and soon they start to murder, sell drugs, etc., to make money.
And then, some mothers, feeling pain about the absence of their male counterparts, unleash evrything on the children. They are physically abusedin the home, and therefore go out into the world practicing what they learnt. They grow up beleiving it is right to abuse everyone else because they were abused.
In conclusion, I think that some mothers and many fathers should be blamed. Both are needed in the lives of their children.
(Proverbs 22:2 – “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he grows old, he will not depart fom it.”)
Speaking from experience if a mother knows that her boy child is up to no good and support his bad criminal behaviours then the mother “must” be criminal responsible for her child action if she is the custodial parent.
it all depends. there are so many contributing factors
the oedipus is active to the son and mothers encourage it, generally sons can do no wrong and and seen as the future providers of materials when old age comes
Its a vicious circle.
Mothers should be held accountable. Believe it or not, those mothers failed in their teaching and enforcing unto their child proper moral values.
mothers should not be responsible for their sons becoming a criminal
not all times
No mothers should not be responsible for their boys becoming a criminal because no matter how good a mother is in in stilling morals and values if a boy child is held bent to do what he wants to do especially if they exposed to peer pressure, or gang.
Yes. Mothers are not able to fully raise a boy to become a man as a result boys are not grown properly and so they are prone to any form of behavior or societal pressures.
I think that mothers should be held responsible for their children’s poor behaviour.
dem fi lock up parent fi boys who kill other people pickney. a parents responsible fi dem children action. If them did teach their child the right thing then then child would not do the wrong. Parents want to blame teachers, but how come? Teacher can do little and no more. Teacher is not the child’s parent so them no responsible for the students action. That is parents responsibility.
The fact that we are asking this question means our society is in a TERRIBLE state of moral decay? reading the comments i did notsee anyone asked…so why mothers?? what about the fathers?? do you guys forget it takes two people to have a child? why now put the blame on a single mother who already have the struggles of rasing a child on her own? Look, if the question stated “should PARENTS be held responsible…” then fine…but to single out the mother? thats downright irrespoonsible and would not be solving the problem. Both the man and woman are to be responsible when they have children and if they fail to raise their child right and give them the guidance to contribute to a better society then BOTH should be held accountable. WE SHOULD BE ASKING WHERE ARE THE RESPONSIBLE MEN???
well gentlemen here is what is needed . first of hall we need a proper social safety net to assist some of these parents.
then we put in a 3 strike and u r out clause that govern education.
first strike and you will be suspending for a week and sent for counseling for that week.
second offense you are sent back to counseling for 1 month.
third strike you are blacklisted from all public school meaning all government run school.
the parent will have to pat if they want him/her to continue to get a education.
this sort of law would get more parent involve in their kids up bringing. because most of them don’t have the money in the first place to send their kids to private schools. so they would want to work with the education system to make school safe again.
Bob, i am all for the hard and soft methods of solving this problem…but what you outlined would not help..reason being 1) you cannot blacklist people from PUBLIC schools…its public and thats the basis of governemnt to ensure they have proper alternatives for children to be aducated..so that will never happen…a lot of these children dont go school anyways so blacklisting them wont solve anything, it just means more uneducated youths…2)If laws/rules are put in place and not enforced they make no sense…case in point- our crime laws…criminals are running amok because we have little means of catching them and putting them to justice so what makes you think the rules you outlined will be followed…3)These people really need help, who are the mothers this question steotypes? mainly the inner city ones..with little education and little oppertunites to make a decent living..why again punish them for being a single parent? Jamaica dont have the resources to be regulating people in this manner with first strike, second strike third strike..and what constitues a strike anyways????
I agree with Mister that parenting needs to be taught in Basic, Primary and secondary schools.
I also believe that this is a non-issue. Each case should be treated based on individual circumstance.
If a child turns to crime and the parent knows about it and supports it then they are accessories to crime and should be dealt with in accordance to the law where that is concerned.
If a child is involved in criminal activity and the parent knows nothing about it or knows about it and has tried to curb it then they shouldn’t be held responsible. That simple.
Why do you have to suffer for your child if nothing you did made them that way. Worse you even tried to stop it?
Excellent points BOb
OK Narda.
here is the definition of 3 strikes. mean any thing you do or say which is against the school rules or against the Law while on school property or while in school uniform to and from school.
If one fallow the discipline that has been set out “think of it, how easy it would be for every body.
Let me make it more simpler so you can understand why I know that it can work. Say I come to Jamaica with a shipment of say MP3 Players. and I said every school kids should get one. I set out the rules on how they will be able to get it, now a kid want to get his/hers but he /she don’t want to fallow the rules to get it.
Do u think he/she should get it any way, while other kids did what they have to do to get theirs?
Narda ,the problem is that we don’t understand what honesty ,trust, and truth really is all about any more. We have no sense of value any morals either. All it is now its money getting rich taking advantage of others to get rich. and thats why it is like this now.
But what I have outlined can work if the Government do these things.
1) make sure that education is a rights , not a privilege. meaning that the Government should make family social programs as part of the education system.
2)Where they make sure that all kids who coming to school are first fed. the parents who cant afford to feed their kids or pay the school fees, These kids should not be prevented from not attending even one day at school. We hear them talk about society and rules of Law. this is a part of the responsibility of society. Its to make sure we left no one behind, if we really want to have and live in a peaceful and prosperous society.
The Government have to follow up and assist all these parents who may need some sort of help, from they get pregnant until the child finish public school, that’s how it should have been done in the first place, we wouldn’t now have to been worrying about kids and bad behavior in school.
OH here is another part I for get to put in my previous outline . Which all kids must go for military training after they leave school. male and female. even if they have a job, they go on the weekends. This is another way to keep them discipline become better parents and pass it on to their kids.
Me or you getting rich, does not make for a better society if the other poorer ones are left behind. One day some one will do something and thats when we will realiz that had we taken our responsibility serious and make sure that every body is taken care of . things wouldn’t have gone wrong.
Should something go wrong it shouldn’t be that hard to be corrected should society did the right thing. Because every body would be singing the same tune. so society could easily recover . if we were doing and thinking clearly of what it mean to have a loving , prosperous ,lawful, peaceful and just society.
Here is why you said my proposal wont work . which I agree with you in that sense, and its this. There is no leader in Jamaica who are ready willing and able to put his or her life on the line and to extricate themselves from the corruption they are currently are a part of.
If any of them would be willing to put Jamaica first. meaning that they don’t have to listen to Dons and others, so they can stay in power. Should they stand up for the country and make sure that the laws are fallowed and enforced. they would be assassinated.
So that’s the only reason my proposal wouldn’t be implemented.
thank you Jax for the support.
This is such a loaded question. Are babies born immaculately? Are there no fathers?
In a society such as Jamaica’s, there is no black and white answer to the question, considering the abundance of negative influences outside of the home.
When a society lacks law enforcement and swift justice, more of its citizens will fall prey to criminality both as victims and perpetrators.
When the education systems fails to equip students with the knowledge and skills to make informed decisions, then the risk of being bad goes up.
When the government fails to provide opportunities for those who make it through the minefields we call schools, then the risk of being bad is even greater. We now have a fertile mind with nothing worthwhile to do. Some of the world’s most daring criminals are some its smartest.
Mothers who were themselves children when they gave birth, cannot be solely held responsible for their children becoming bad. What should they do? Lock them away in their homes?
Society must set examples for children to want to emulate. Crime in Jamaica pays hence the desire for more boys to be criminals. The Laws of the law must be enforced and justice must be seen and felt.
Lack of clear standards of acceptable behavior is what is causing boys to be bad. Not mothers who themselves lack the social and parenting skills necessary to rear upstanding citizens.
Ok Bob
I agree Steve
Nonsense, a bad boy belongs behind bars and should be placed there until he is reformed
BOTH parents are responsible for nurturing and training their children to become successful citizens, who are not a danger to themselves and to the society.
When it comes to boys, the FATHER is especially responsible; because females CANNOT raise males!
Male offspring are far more aggressive of the gender; and they need fathers who will impose limit on the boys’ aggressiveness in so many ways that a mother cannot!
Girls ALSO need fathers around; but girls are less inclined towards the kind of aggression that could eventually lead to criminality.
Mothers raising unfortunate boys alone, poses the greatest danger for the boys and for the rest of the society.
Well most of the repllies has some good facts in relation to the so call BAD BOY. I shall just do mine’s in point form. First it’s a GOVERNMENTAL PROBLEM.Jamaica needs more trade schools, and apprenticships program through the Ministry of LABOUR. The Education system needs to be RENOVATED. Its too much trail with an HIGH percentage of ERRORS. Jamaica has lost its culture, and have out rightly EMBRACES the Americans way of life in every way shape and form.This alone has had a great INFLUENCE,IMPACT and behaviour on our CHILDREN. When one loses its culture, it also loses its MORALS, PRINCLES, RESPECT, ITS COMMUNITY, and its ability, and capabilty to function within its own SOROUNDINGS. So what happens their is no MODULE or Models that these CHILDREN can IMULATE. It takes a COMMUNITY to GROW CHILDREN, not only MOTHERS, and FATHERS.It also needs QUALIFIED Teachers whom undestand BASIC behaviour of children. And not only to teach BASIC School SUBJECTS.We need more BOYS CAMPS, like Chestervale, and COBBELA CAMPS for boys. We do have too many version of schools in JAMAICA. And its very confusing in DETERMINE which is which.We need more COMMUNITY CENTRES for young MOTHERS to more self worthy, and be invilved within their COMMUNITUES, and LEARNING some thing of COSIQUENCIES. This is where students within the UNIVERITIES could help their respective communities, as well as their COUNTRY. I have read a few of these letters, and a HIGH percentage has been BLAMING our young ladies. And has a man having many NEICES, I tend to oppose. Our culture MEN for some UNKOWN has always taken or try to take ADVNATAGE of our women from a SEXUAL stand-point. Most times they are FORCED, BULLIED, RAPED, or TREATENED against their WISHES. And since our POPULATION has gotten BIGGER, it has even gotten WORST. Until OUR people is EDUCATED enough to UNDERSTAND, and to be AWARE to what is REALLY happening to them as well as in there COMMUNITIES, and SOROUNDINGS especially the INNER-CITES, and TOWNS.Then we might be able to LESSEN the above HAPPENINGS.
Children need Parental Guidance, Love, Direction on which path to take to succeed! They need to be taught right from wrong in any circumstance! They need to be praised not beaten or yelled at! As a parent myself, you only get what you give! Children hear everything you say, they mimic everything you do and that is how they learn! If you don’t know where your children are at night you have given up! Go find them and bring them home where they belong! Encourage children to do better! No one person is perfect! Children are smaller images of their parents! Do everything you can to help your children, watch over them carefully and make them stay at home if they are getting into trouble! If they don’t go to school take them by the hand and make sure they do! Teach them to be positive, to have respect, to be patience, kind and to share! I am still learning to be a parent and will never give up on my kids until my time ends!